The Big Smooch
by Onigiri49
Summary: Reality Dating Hits Uses different male characters from different cartoons!
1. The Big Smooch

This is a story I decided to write. _It is using one or more characters each from the following shows that to which I do NOT own (Disclaimer):_

_Arthur, Tiny Toon Adventures, Ed, Edd, n' Eddy, As Told By Ginger, Hey Arnold!, Invader Zim, Dexter's Laboratory, Liberty's Kids, and Baby Looney Tunes. I also do not own ANY of the characters from those following shows!_

Okay, so, this story (if you can call it that) uses male characters that to which I love! They will go against each other to try and win my love! Hee hee! So, without further ado, here it is!

Bella, that's me, sits down in her hard brown chair facing the boys of her dreams. There's Alan "The Brain" Powers from 'Arthur', George the moose also from 'Arthur', Calamity Coyote from 'Tiny Toon Adventures', Edward (Edd) "Double D" from 'Ed, Edd, n' Eddy', Blake Gripling from 'As Told By Ginger', Sid from 'Hey Arnold!', Dib from 'Invader Zim', (baby) Sylvester from 'Baby Looney Tunes', "Doctor" ((What's his real name?)) from 'Dexter's Laboratory', and Henri Richard Maurice Dutoit LeFebvre from 'Liberty's Kids'.

('Doctor' is a little brown-headed boy with big blue (cute) eyes. I LOVE HIM! Uh, I know extremely little about him, but I will try my best. He (as far as I know) was only shown in episode "Star Check Unconventional". He's just too cute to not mention in my story. Probably all of my readers do not know (or remember) him. I do not remember if he had a name. He was referred to with a name from a character he was acting out of a show Dexter and his friends (he was one of the friends) liked. I remember this boy loved women, got distracted easily, and was OH SO CUTE! Ahem... please read on...).

* * *

They are all seated in a row in separate chairs facing me. I'm in front of a desk with paper on it to take notes on their responses.

"Okay," I begin. "Sid, how about you start? How can you win my love?"

Sid starts to sweat. "I uh..."

"It appears that he has nothing to say. Let's move on to me shall we?" Blake hotly says.

"Hey I'm two years older than you! That means I speak first!" Sid yells back at the smaller blond boy.

"Age has nothing to do with it." Brain tells them.

"Who cares? I'm first!" Sid angrily says.

"Yes, okay. You are." Brain answers.

"Stupid bear." Sid mutters. To me, "Okay. Well I would first take you to this awesome building that has, like, thousands of pigeons! Man, there are so many! Then I'll take you to see this new movie. Well, uh, actually I'll just let you pick a movie. As long as it's not girly or somethin'."

"Don't worry. I hate girly movies, too." I reply. I write down his answer. "Good response. Then what would we do at the end of the date?"

"Date?" He squeaks. I look at him. "Oh, um, date, yeah. Well, we wouldn't kiss."

"I can understand that. You are too young." I say.

"No matter how young I am I will always go after the women. Such as you, Bella." 'Doctor' flirts.

Sid stares at the little big-eyed boy.

"Yeah, well. We would just hold hands I guess. Hey! We can check out this store that is full of things to capture vampires and stuff!" he exclaims.

"Vampires? There's no such thing!" Dib tells him.

"Of course there is! Haven't you heard of the legend, told by my friend Gerald, of the..." he answers.

"There's no such thing! Aliens exist! Not vampires!" Dib irritably says.

"Oh yeah? Have you ever seen an alien?" Sid slyly asks.

"As a matter of fact I have! He's here to destroy Earth and I'm trying to stop him! His name's Zim! You know, the green kid?" Dib questions him.

"Ahem, if you have indeed seen an alien, why that's amazing! Countless scientists have tried to prove the existence of aliens. Have you told them of your discovery yet?" Edd asks excitedly. As they all are talking I am writing down Sid's answer.

"Err, no. They don't believe me. No one ever does." Dib answers sadly.

"I believe you, Dib." I tell him. Dib instantly perks up at this. I move on.

"Okay. Well, Blake would you like to go next?" I ask.

"Do I ever! Hmm... I would first let you swim in our inside pool. Then we could, since it's apparently what girls like, go shopping. And of course you could buy practically anything you want! After that we would go to the finest restaurant in town! In the end, my butler Winston would drive you home in our limousine, and I would kiss you on the cheek goodnight!" he announces happily.

"Very nice. You certainly had that planned in your head beforehand, huh?" I ask. He smiles. I write down his response. I look at my list... "Yes, uh Double D? What would you do for me?"

"Oh, I would um..." he hesitates.

"Yes?" I ask.

"I think a nice stroll in a public park would be nice. We could smell the flowers. Hear the soft gentle wind go through your clean hair. I could concoct a new shampoo that would be the most perfect for your type of hair! And..."

"Uh, that's very nice Edward. I truly do love nature." I tell him.

"If it's nature you love then we could go star gazing with my telescope." Brain declares.

"Euhh, sorry for interrupting, but what iz a shampoo?" Henri asks.

Everyone bursts out laughing, except for Calamity of course, who silently laughs.

"Um, excuse my asking, but who are you again?" Edd asks him.

Henri stands up and bows while answering. "I am Henri Richard Maurice Dutoit LeFebvre. But you may all call me Henri. I'm French!" he answers proudly.

"So that's why you have a weird accent!" Dib says aloud.

Henri looks hurt.

"Now that's not polite!" Edd scolds.

"Neither was laughing at him earlier. I'm sorry that I did that too, actually." Brain apologizes.

"I like the way he talks!" Baby Sylvester exclaims.

"Yeah, me too. It's sounds, um..." Sid tried to think of the right word.

"Romantic?" Blake provides.

Henri blushes. "Well, you have an accent too!"

"Yes, but it's certainly not as strong as a French one!" Blake replies.

"You must attract the ladies with that voice of yours." 'Doctor' tells Henri.

"You also have the LONGEST name I've ever heard!" Sid yells.

Henri looks uneasy yet flattered at 'Doctor's' comment. "Mademoiselle Bella? May I please have someone answer my question? Vhat iz so funny?" he asks confused.

I stare at the others to answer his question.

"Very well. Shampoo is..." Edd starts.

"That soapy stuff that cleans your fur!... or hair." Baby Sylvester says.

Henri is still confused.

"More correctly it is a type of soap used for washing hair. It was invented in 1877." Edd answers.

"1877? That's roughly 100 years from my time. How waz I supposed to know vhat it iz? I come from the 18th century!" Henri yells.

"Impressive." Brain simply says.

"Now that that's cleared up. Who would like to go next?" I ask.

"I had already started so I might as well." Brain clears his throat. "What I would do is... is... can I pass for the moment?"

"Sure." I give him a warm smile. "Henri? Would you like to go next?"

Henri just sits there ignoring me.

"Henri?" I repeat.

He stiffly gets up and walks toward me. He whispers in my ear, "I do not vant to talk. Some of them 'ate my accent."

"But that's one of the main reasons why I picked you..." I tell him with a pouty lip.

"Really?" he says loudly. "Oh," he turns around and glares at Dib, Calamity, George, and Blake who are snickering at him. They become quiet. "Hmph. Az I vanted to say, vhat I would do first iz let us go kite flying. It'z great fun! Then we could catch toads and frogs, but euhh. You're a girl. You might not like that."

"What's with all this girl stuff? Why, I would love to catch toads and frogs, and then let them go. That'd be fun!" I reassure him.

"Great! Um, okay, then we climb trees and end up eating a delicious meal I can get from Dr. Franklin once he sees that I 'ave a date!" he smiles. He seems finished so I write down what he said.

"Who's Dr. Franklin?" Dib asks him.

"Only the most famous man ever! He'z Benjamin Franklin. You know, he iz an inventor, author, musician, statesman and leader, AND he 'elped guide the formation of America!" he gleefully says.

"You know Ben Franklin?" Edd asks.

"Not only do I KNOW 'im, I live with 'im, too!" he replies.

"Boy howdy! But what about your parents?" Sid questions.

Henri looks at him, "I uh... don't 'ave any parents. Dr. Franklin took me in."

"Sorry that that has happened to you." Brain tells him. "Well, if he's done. May I go now? I have decided what to say."

"Okay... shoot." I say.

"First of all we would go to the Exploratorium. They have different models of things in the human body, such as a human heart. A favorite of mine is a room where everything is upside down. There's also a model of the DNA, and countless other remarkable things. After that we could journey on over to the library and read whatever your heart desires!" he tells me.

"It's reminds me of a place called Discovery Place... except that doesn't have an upside down room! Awesome! Now THAT would be so cool! Good answer." he beams at this. I write down his answer and see who is left on my list: Dib, Calamity, Sylvester, 'Doctor,' and George.

"Aren't you just so smart?" Sid sarcastically says to Brain.

"Perhaps it's why I'm nicknamed Brain!" he replies.

"What is your real name, my good fellow?" Blake asks.

"It's Alan." He replies calmly.

"I love that name..." I dreamily say to myself.

"You do?" Brain asks taken aback.

"Yes. It's a favorite boy name of mine. I also love Alden, Chris, Caleb and Michael. And some other names I can't think of at the moment, too." I reply.

"Aren't bears supposed to be dumb?" Dib asks teasingly.

"Do you have something against animals?" Baby Sylvester questions.

Calamity holds up a sign. It reads, 'Yea!' George is nodding in agreement to Sylvester's question. Brain is simply mad at the remark.

"Hmm... Let's move on." I look around the room. "How about... Calamity Coyote?"

"You're a coyote? Freaky." Sid says.

"What an interesting creature... uh, why did you just hold a sign up earlier? Don't you speak?" Edd questions.

Calamity shakes his head silently.

"How are you going to answer her question then?" Blake asks.

Calamity doesn't answer, by voice or print.

"How about you write down your answer on my paper?" I tell him. "Step over here."

Calamity quietly gets up and walks over to my desk. He bends down and scribbles his answer down with a spare pen that was on my paper. After a few seconds he stops, looks over his answer quickly, then sits back down at his seat.

Suddenly, after all this silence, a book is dropped loudly on the hard wooden floor. Dust rises up and covers the heavy book.

"YAHHH!" Sylvester yells. We all look up and see his nails clawed into the low ceiling above us. He's looking back down at us all. He gets a shocked expression on his face when he realizes he's about to fall. (Read the last two sentences... they rhyme! )

Sylvester plummets down and lands on the floor.

"Ooh," he groans. Just then a glass of water from my table falls over the edge and lands on him. "AHHH!" He goes back up the ceiling but doesn't reach it, so he falls right back down the same way. I rush over to him. "Kitty? Are you all right? Sylvester, are you hurt?"

"I'm fine," he says.

"What?" I ask. He gets off the floor slowly.

"I'm fine," he says a bit louder.

We both hear a nervous giggling behind us. I turn to see it's Edd.

"Sorry," he gingerly picks up his book, and set it back on his lap. Brain glances at the book.

"Biology for the Astute, fascinating. So you're also a, ahem, genius?" Brain questions him.

Edd gives him a bashful smile, "You could say that."

"You scared the poor cat." 'Doctor' says.

"I-I'm all right. That's happened before... more than once." Sylvester grins sheepishly.

"And sorry about the water." I say to him.

"Guess cats ARE afraid of water." Sid observes.

"O-kay. Seeing as that he's in good health. Let's read Calamity's answer shall we?" I say. Most of them listen attentively. "AHEM!" The rest stop fussing over Sylvester, and listen in. "He wrote: One: A tour guide of Acme. Two: A day of catching Little Beeper if you so desire to do so. Three: The Library at Acme Looniversity. Four: A swim in the Acme swamp/pond by Plucky Duck's reed house. Five: A walk back to your home. Six: A secret. Secret?" I ask myself.

"Who's Little Beeper and Plucky Duck? And where is Acme and Acme Looniversity?" Asks Edd.

"Little Beeper is this flee-footed bird called a roadrunner which is some type of bird. One of two species of bird actually in the genus Geococcyx of the cuckoo family Cuculidae. Plucky Duck is this silly green duck with an ego the size of Cleveland. Acme is where Calamity and his friends live. Don't ask questions on its whereabouts. And Acme Loon is the Acme school." I smile.

The others stare at me.

"...What?" I ask.

They ignore me and continue reading, or doing whatever it is that they do when they're bored.

"... Hmph. Whatever. Um, what's the secret Calamity?" I question him.

Calamity smiles surreptitiously while he holds up a sign that reads, 'you'll see... if you choose me...'

I give him the lower lip. "Fine. Well, let's see who's next hm?" I look around the room and see the 'geniuses' (besides Calamity that is) Brain, Edd, and Dib discuss something about chemistry. "Calamity. Will you please get their attention for me?"

Calamity looks skeptically at me before walking over to the three excited young geniuses. Being a genius himself Calamity knew he could do this task. Only one problem, what could he do? He thinks to himself and ends up taking out a book of his own, one titled 'Quantum Physics'. He drops the book. Just like the latter book, it makes a loud boom. The three look up in alarm. Calamity holds a sign to me that reads, 'there you go'.

"Thanks." I tell him. He turns over his sign. It reads, 'no problem'. Calamity sits down content and silent.

"Now listen up! We still have four kids left. How about... 'Doctor'?" I say.

"We could check out Star Check Convention. It has the best toys, as long as we don't go to that other place: the one with girl toys and junk." He gets a dreamy look. "'course there are foxy ladies there _purr_." I give him a stare that feels like a slap in his face. He focuses. "The Star Check Convention it is. I'll dress as Doctor and you'll dress as... I guess some beautiful princess who's been captured and is in trouble. We could make it into a game and then watch our favorite shows like Action Hank, Major Glory, and stuff all day!" 'Doctor' exclaims.

"Uh-huh, that sounds... nice uh... ahem?" I try to get his attention. "Why does no one ever listen to me?" I mutter to myself. I see 'Doctor' looking angrily at Sylvester who's about to claw him because 'Doctor' got him mad when he accidentally hit him from the excitement of what he told me. "Pay attention you two, and don't kill each other." I quickly write down 'Doctor's' response. "Now, as I was saying, next we have um..." I check my list. "Dib!"

Dib glances up at me. He was chattering quietly with Edd. "Yes? Oh, right, um... I would take you to Bloaty's Pizza Hog. It's popular for its pizza and it has this guy named Bloaty there who sings this annoying 'doo dee doo dee doo dee doo' song over and over again. Also kids who go there chant 'Bloaty's Pizza Hog' and these mechanical mascots bob up and down. It's all maddening, but it's better than nothing. I guess after that we'd, if you don't mind, try and capture Zim. With your help I just might succeed and Earth will be saved from his reign of terror! Then we could star gaze. The sky is very beautiful at night." He tells me.

"Good response." I write it down. "...Next we have Sylvester!" I shout out.

Sylvester retracts his claws. He puts a paw to his chin and thinks. "I think I would, um... have Granny make us cookies. She makes the best cookies! Then we could play hide and seek and play the games that you like!"

"I love Simon Says." I tell him.

"Yay! Me too! Then we can have a nice nap and then... HEY! That's mine!" He grabs back his ball of yarn from Henri.

"Well, excusez moi. I just vanted to see it." Henri says.

"What's x-cube-be-ma?" Sylvester asks.

"It's French. It means 'excuse me'. Can't you hear the similarity?" Henri asks.

"I guess so." Sylvester shrugs his shoulders.

"Oui, enfin." Henri mutters. He crosses his arms.

"Done Sylvester?" I ask him. He nods happily. I write down his answer. "Last, but not least, is George the moose. George?"

"I uh, I mean, that is. Um..." He stutters.

"Just spit it out!" Sid yells at him.

"Uh, okay, um... I could teach you ventriloquism and how to tell funny jokes. And um... do you do poetry?" He asks me.

"Why, yes. I do." I answer.

"So do I! We could compare our poetry and maybe even recite them to a poetry reading if there is one going on at the time in Elwood City." He continues.

"Before it is asked... Elwood City is where we live." Brain announces.

"We?" Dib asks.

"Yes. George and I live in the same city. We even have the same class together. Um, not to sound rash, but why did you pick us both Miss Bella? We're nothing alike." Brain questions.

"I have my reasons..." I reply sneakily.

"Then we could go around town and see what's going on. Almost always something is happening. Or just go to the Sugar Bowl. They give yummy ice cream there!" He tells me.

"Very good response." I write down this last answer. "Well now that's everyone. Time for me to choose who the winner is..." I look around the room and at the separate responses.

"I choose... _deep sigh_ gosh this is hard. I have it down to Brain, Calamity, and Blake. Um... well, let's see." I look over their responses. "Okay, it's now between Blake, 'cause you're cute and I would LOVE to go shopping and be able to get anything I want!" I giggle, "And Calamity, other than your intelligence and cuteness is that I want to know that secret!... and a tour guide of Acme? That would be sooo cool!... Well!" I sigh again invigorated with my choice. "I choose... ooh! This is pretty hard, ya know? But I pick... Calamity Coyote!"

"WHAT?" Ask most all the others.

"Yup! Now, tell me. What IS the secret Calamity?" I ask him.

Calamity almost doesn't hear me. He is ecstatic that HE was chosen! Henri nudges him. Calamity makes a silent 'Oh!' and grins at me, but then frowns embarrassed. He holds up a sign that reads, 'I will finally speak at the end of our date'.

This hits me like a swarm of locusts. "Whoa." I laugh. "You mean you actually CAN?"

Calamity nods while holding up yet another sign. It reads, 'I am not physically unable to. I just never want to talk as I am incredibly shy.'

I smile at him. "Okay. Well, that's the end of that! Thank you all for coming. I love each and every one of you very, VERY much!" I take Calamity's hand. "Let's go!"

All the others get up to leave. Edd goes to where the broken glass from my drink lies. He starts to sweep it up while muttering "Messy, messy, messy."

"Thanks for cleaning Edward." I say, smiling. He gasps a little at the fact that I said his real name, but then he smiles back politely. I see George go out the door but get his right antler stuck in Sid's hat.

"Oops. Sorry." He apologizes. He slips his antler out.

"_Sigh_ It's all right." Sid walks out after him. Sylvester follows Sid, playing with his ball of yarn. The rest walk out after them. Calamity and I are the last there after Edd leaves. We grin at each other and exit the building.

* * *

_What cha think, what cha think, what cha think of it? Huh, huh, huh, huh, huh? (I ask while jumping up and down like Dib did in episode 'Halloween Spectacular of Spooky Doom'.)_

_Please review!_


	2. Author Note:

Author Note: I mentioned about 'Doctor.' To see his picture go to this site:  
  
www.geocities.com /Hollywood /Studio /9687 /supersite /episodes /dex64.html  
  
(I put a space between a written word/# and a /. When you want to go to this site, everything that has a space in it... put together. I just did it like that so it would get posted on here.)  
  
(His cutest picture to me is the second one down on the right.)  
  
Ciao! 


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